[blockquote source=”Dogen Zen-ji”]”To know yourself is to forget yourself. To forget yourself is to become enlightened by all things.”[/blockquote]

I was listening to a wonderful discussion on the importance of cultivating unconditional love.

The topic was on ‘maitri’ – a Buddhist term to define the intention and capacity to offer joy and happiness to all beings (including ourselves).

But, what does that really mean? How do we fully engage ourselves in this practice?

It’s not just about treating yourself to a spa day, or allowing yourself the luxury of a little extra snooze…this is much deeper.

This is the digging in, the ‘getting to the heart’ of it all…and, that takes a whole lot of courage.

It’s not easy to look into our experiences with the honesty necessary to fully appreciate the value of that moment. But, it’s critical in deepening our compassion for others as well as, ourselves.

Sadly though, for some the experience of suffering can be quite limiting. And, in place of compassion, a hardening grows.

Pema Chödrön tells a delightful story from her childhood:

“One time when I was a child, I was feeling very upset and angry at one point. I think I was around seven or eight. And there was this old woman, who I later become very close to. But the first time I ever met her, I was walking down the street kicking stones with my head down, and I was feeling very lonely. I was basically feeling that nobody loved me very much and that people weren’t taking care of me. So I was walking along angry at the world, kicking stones.

And this woman said,

“Child, don’t let the world harden your heart.”

I like to think maitri as the joy of acceptance, the bliss of not taking things too so very seriously…the certainty that though the world may be tumbling around us, still…there is always a softness within our hearts.

And, from this softness grows eternal love.

As Ani Pema continues,

“When we are not so self-involved, we begin to realize that the world is speaking to us all of the time. Every plant, every tree, every animal, every person, every car, every airplane is speaking to us, teaching us, awakening us. It’s a wonderful world, but we often miss it. It’s as if we see the previews of coming attractions and never get to the main feature.”

And, such is our path – with bowed branches, gilded in the leaves of acceptance.